If you’re living with an overwhelming number of sentimental treasures that are cluttering up your home and nagging at your relationships, it is time to get it sorted. However, this can be very difficult to focus on. If you’re finding it hard to decide what to keep and what to let go of, here’s my advice: have the conversation.
Ask yourself why you have this item. Did you specifically ask for it, buy it, get given it or was it expected that by default, you would look after it?
If it is an inherited item you have been given or even asked for, decide if that is still fair and reasonable for you to keep hold of it or could it be better appreciated and used by someone else. It is not wise to be ‘ruled from the grave’ on non-titled assets.
If you are trying to preserve the memory of a beloved, perhaps there is another way to express your love – photo collages, memory benches, online album sharing, fund an annual school prize in their honour or some other way to share the experience of that person’s life with others.
Empty Nesting Materials
If your children have flown the nest, yet haven’t dealt with their leftover cheap clothes, comics and collectables, then this summer is a great time to say “if I decided to downsize, what would you like to do with your things?” Don’t ruin your own living environment with an absentee’s possessions, unless you truly love all their stuff as well! That goes for holding on to ex-partner’s personal effects. If they don’t want it, who are you keeping it for?
We Need to Talk…
If you are holding on to a possession to give to your children in the future, discuss it with them NOW. I find the quickest way to get responses from my own young adults is to use the media they use: take a smartphone photo & send it with a quick question via Messenger, Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, Viber or whatever glues them to their screens. Do they want this now? Will they want it later? What do they think you should do with it? If they are not interested, then you might be wasting valuable space in vain hope or ‘just in case’. Quick questions and answers might reveal some interesting truths.
The gift of giving brings joy, not the gift itself!
Take stock of the accumulation of gifts, prizes, treasures and fun things from relatives, birthdays, schools, Xmas, outings and holidays – keep talking to yourself. In that moment of transaction, that act of giving or receiving brought joy. But now the moment has passed and the object that it is hidden/tossed/broken/stored along with everything else is creating disharmony and clutter. Treasure the memory but let the stuff go.
Ask questions. Assumptions are the woodworm of relationships
Having an honest conversation with yourself and your family will start to identify the things that are truly important and help you (and them) to part – guilt-free – with the rest without damaging the things that matter.
What are your #TreasuredTreasures and what makes them special and important to you? We’d love you to share them with us. See https://www.facebook.com/right.size/ or @RightsizeHQ on Twitter.